Sex and Gender

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Nick Nakashian Extra Credit Response

Nick Nakashian

Soc 131

Extra Credit Response

Masculinity is a gender that is defined by many physical and active qualities. To be considered masculine entails being able to perform many physical and visible traits. Men are strong, confident, demanding and good with their hands; at least these are some of the qualities that are thought of as masculine. Men who do not posses most of these qualities may be thought of as not as masculine as their peers

For example I am terrible at working with tools and fixing things, where as my dad is one of those who can fix anything and likes to do everything himself. So because I am not as good with mechanical projects as my dad, male social rules make me seem inferior to him, that he is more of a man than I am. This has made me try to be more masculine in other areas of my life, to be more athletic or self-driven and achieve higher in school. However if I were born female I don't believe that many of the things in my life would change because I am involved in a lot of things that I believe are gender neutral. For example I am an art history major, and this is a field that is not dominated by either sex. I have had just as many female art professors as I have had males; I have read just as many textbooks written by males with doctorates, as I have read from females with doctorates. Also I used to be a competitive swimmer and this is a sport that is just as popular with men as it is women. We swim the same events; the same practices and even share lanes together.

In my interview, my interviewee had similar feelings to if she had been born male, in regards to being involved with things that are more general neutral. Majoring in sociology, my interviewee believes she would still be interested in this area of study if she were a man, because it was a man, her boyfriend also a sociology major, who sparked her interest in the subject. Also she currently works with special needs children, a career that is dominated by females, however my interviewee feels she could have still been involved in this area because again it was due to the influence of a man in the field that sparked her interest. Being one of three daughters, my interviewee tried do share as many activates with her dad as one girl can; the only thing she feels would have changed in her life, had she been born a male is that she would have been different experiences she could have shared with her father.

http://icati.catishack.com/uploads/NickNakashian/NickNakashian-17577779088-20140911-1410398793.627.mp3

Extra Credit Participation

Anna Allen

Growing up, I never really felt really pressured by my family to behave in one way or another. My parents were all right with my playing with "boy toys" and "girl toys" alike when I was growing up; going through drive-thrus and ordering from the kids menu always ended in questions like "Anna, do you want a dragon or a My Little Pony today?" Playtimes were epic with Godzilla, Barbies, trucks, dinosaurs, unicorns, pirate ships, and horse-drawn carriages (one of my mom's favorite stories to tell is the one where our puppy chewed the arms off of Sleeping Beauty, and rather than being upset about the attack, I told my mother that "That's okay; it'll be more realistic when Godzilla eats it"). Playing "house" bored me to death. I played sports with enthusiasm. I exhilarated in riding horses. I loved Pokemon (the show and the games), and was so happy when, in generation II's Crystal version, they introduced the option to be a girl. When I was old enough, I worked at the ranch with my parents while I was going to school, with all the veterinary humor and dirty jobs included. I dislike feeling dependent on things. Being "quiet" is a struggle. I took jazz and ballet classes. My high school counselor was flummoxed when I chose to take weight training for my remaining PE credit, where I was one of only four girls in a class of thirty, and the only one of those girls who wasn't there solely to ogle our male classmates (by the girls' own admissions). I have never been terribly understanding when someone says someone can't do something because "she's a girl."

If I was a boy, things could be very different. Things could also be very similar. There is a possibility that I would just become an Anna with no boobs and a penis, still pretty comfortable with all my likes and dislikes. However, it might also be true that society would have more of a problem with a boy's playing with "girl toys" along with the "boy toys" and I would have grown up to be a timid, submissive young man, or even one that was much more aggressive and defensive about things. Perhaps I would have grown to be a closed-minded person. Even with my raising's being the same, there is a likelihood that I would have chosen different friends, and would have had a different socialization that way. Maybe I wouldn't have been as lucky with these different friends as I've been with the ones I have now. Or maybe I would have made similar friends, and I would continue to reside more toward the middle of the masculine/feminine social spectrum. Perhaps I would still actively play sports. I would likely have a different way of expressing my opinions—less expressive of emotions, but more assertive about my suggestions and opinions. I would be much less concerned about going out by myself—I highly doubt that I would still feel the need to carry pepperspray on my person, or worry about someone spiking my drink at a party. Perhaps I would have more slurs turned against me about being a sex-obsessed animal just because I was male. I'd probably get fewer scholarships. I'd likely be expected to drink more, especially whiskey and beer (my dad's and grandpa's favorites—grandpa still gives my dad grief about not liking gin, so I can only imagine what it would be if his grandson/dad's son disliked all those the way I do as their daughter/granddaughter). However, I honestly believe that, if the main points in my life were the same, I would turn out to be more or less the same person.

Jose Guerrero

Being Mexican American our thoughts on masculine and how to be a man are taught to us at a very young age by our fathers. From a young age we are taught that we should never show any emotions in front of others. Especially when it comes to crying, never cry in front of others. Obviously growing up like this now i am applying the same principals to my young son. Now if it was the other way around, and i was a female it would be totally different. From growing up with three older sisters i was able to tell my parents had fewer rules for me as to what my sisters had. Until this day they still say that i am spoiled by both my mother and father. I know if i was a girl in my family i wouldn't be allowed to go at night and more less have a boyfriend. So i know i wouldn't have liked being a girl and having a younger brother because there is a lot of stuff he could have done and being a girl wanting to do the same would have not happened.

When i interviewed a female in class about this she had the same response. She is the oldest in her family with younger brothers, and she is Mexican. She claimed to still having many rules to follow around the house and also having a curfew if and when she can go out with friends. She said she would have liked being a male just to be able to have the freedom.

soc 131 extra credit

http://icati.catishack.com/uploads/HeatherMcDermott/HeatherMcDermott-12096617218-20140911-1410398776.625.mp3

During my interview, my understanding was that being born a male instead of a female would of been easier in life. Being a male seems less restrictive and more relaxed , compared to being a woman. Being a woman you have more responsibilities in choosing the right decisions for fear of being judged. Being born a male seems like the person would have less inequality to worry about, as well as having more opportunities in life. Women are still discriminated against and men are still the dominant role in society.

My take on this question is that I believe I wouldn't of gotten as far as I did in life if I was a male. I grew up in the system so the odds were never in my favor and being a women I didn't want to end up on the streets like most aged out foster youth do, so I fought really hard to get where I am today. I feel like if I was a male I wouldn't of cared as much since I didn't need to be protected I would of just not cared. Being a women has made me feel like I have to protect myself, so I do not get taken advantage of . Men do not get taken advantage of in the same ways that women do. Im glad I was born a women.

Extra Credit

Since my respondent was a female who grew up in the system, she believed that had she been born a male, she would've in fact wound up worse off in life and wouldn't have managed to come so far. As she talked about growing up in the system she said that, although there aren't just two ways a girl can turn out in the system, one way is by becoming a drug addict, getting pregnant, or becoming a prostitute. The other way is by fighting for yourself since there isn't anyone else who would fight for you. However, although men have similar statistics for becoming addicts they just have it easier. She had a brother who was one and she said that it seemed like he used it as an excuse. Furthermore, she's says the system treats women the same way they've been treated throughout history and still do today. By how women are still paid less, treated like they are pieces of meat, and have different expectations placed on them especially when it comes to kids. That a woman who abandons her baby for drugs is a whore but a guy who sells the drugs or kills people is a deadbeat father. She states that the women who fought on women's behave to get their rights during the Civil Rights movement would be rolling over in their graves since even now women are treated like sex symbols or feel inferior to their husbands, because of these preconceived notions of how men and women should act. She told a story of how her niece said she wanted to be a firefighter, but her aunt told her that it was a boy job and wouldn't she want to do some nice girl job like dealing with cute clothes. Instead, she said if she wants to be a firefighter then let her be a firefighter. She thinks that had she been a male, that although there would be some ways that might make it a bit hard, that it wouldn't have mattered how she turned out and that she wouldn't have gotten very far in life.

http://icati.catishack.com/uploads/HeatherMcDermott/HeatherMcDermott-12096617218-20140911-1410398493.603.mp3

In my eyes had I been born a male I think I would be drastically different from the person I am today. I think that my beliefs, values, and notions of what should or shouldn't be wouldn't be the same. Being a woman, as you grow up you're kind of pushed into being "girly" and doing "girly things" so it makes you more sensitive to things. When I was little I had an older brother and I followed him around constantly. So when I saw him playing in the mud, or with frogs, or with toy cars, or watching teenage mutant ninja turtles that's what I wanted to do too and I enjoyed it. But as I grew older I was labeled the "tom boy" and was usually ignored by the boys my age since it seemed so strange that a girl would like the same things they did. It made me feel really uncomfortable for acting the way I did or enjoying the things I did. So, I tried to do more girly things like play dress up or with dolls, but never completely gave up the things that I liked. I think if I had been male, I wouldn't have been as sensitive to the way others viewed me, because I would've been doing what was only the natural things a boy should do and wouldn't think anything of it anymore. But, being a girl gave me a different perspective and I grew more aware of what our society has labeled normal girl and boy behavior. Due to this I grew to dislike these norms that are demanded of us and began to think that there was nothing wrong with a girl liking so called "boy things" and a boy liking so called "girl things." I don't believe that there should be any kind of distinction at all. You like what you like regardless of what sex you are or perceive yourself to be. Being born a man I'm not sure I would've had the same mindset that I do now.

Interview link

How would your life be different if you were born the opposite sex?

http://icati.catishack.com/uploads/CynthiaQuintanilla/CynthiaQuintanilla-17186736129-20140911-1410398557.614.mp3

Karla Cuevas

If i were born of the opposite sex my life would be different. I am a
female and as a female I am expected to act a certain way. The way i
dressed and who i was able to hang out with was gender socialization
since I was young. Growing up I had and older sister and older brother
therefor, I already had a female role model, but I was always more
drawn to my brother. I would play football, basketball, marbles, and
any other games my brother would play. I remember getting lectured
many times by my mother telling me I was a girl and how i should not
be out there with the boys that i should play inside. Growing up I was
thought how to cook because if my mom was at work I had to do the
cooking for the guys. Even when it came to choosing a career my dad
would push me to be a nurse or a teacher because it was a "girl job."
As a female I have encountered gender stereotyping in the work field
because I am a female i should ask for help when lifting something
heavy. I get customers who tell me "Where are the guys to help lift
this?" or my favorite "You are going to lift this by yourself?" I have
always liked education and the idea of being a teacher was something
that I did want to do. Now if I were a male things would be different.
I would be expected to be strong and manly. The pressure of my parents
would be there to move out and start a family. To go to school and
become a cop or lawyer. If I were a guy my views would probably still
be same. As a male I would not care what people would say about me. I
think typically as a female we care more about what people say about
us and we tend to care more about our appearance than guys and I think
that has a lot to do with society. Just like it would be okay for a
male to have a few beers with his friends outside in a porch, but it
would not be okay for females to do the same if they did they would
probably be stereotyped.

During my interview I asked my interviewee how would her life be if
she was born of the opposite sex and she was quick to tell me that her
views would probably remain the same but she would be less bitter. She
does believe that being a female sucks and that religion does not
offer anything good for females. As a mother she believes she was
stuck playing the house wife because that was expected of her, but
when I asked if she were a male what would be her role or what would
she do knowing she was going to be a father. She stated that she would
take full responsibility of the child but she would not stick around
just because she had a child.

Marisa Diaz

When presented with the question "how would your life be different if you were born of the opposite sex" my Interviewee discussed the different ways in which she would be different. She believes that everything would change from the type of people she would spend time with, down to her extracurricular activities.

My interviewee discussed that the type of sports that she participated in would change from "feminine" sports such as color guard to a more "masculine" sport like football. She also said the people in which she associates with would also change. For example her friends, being of the opposite sex she believes that she would no longer hang around the same people she does being a woman.

I, like many other people, believe in the idea that society shape the way Men and women should behave, However when I am given the same exact question I don't believe that much about me would change. I think the way I was brought up I would still have the same hobbies that I do now. Because I was raised by mostly males I believe that society already sees me as "opposite". I do however think that society would behave more differently if I was the opposite sex such as I would not be getting calls every hour to see where I'm at, when I'm out at night. Considering I'm the only girl in my family I think the over perfectiveness would not exist.

Unlike my interviewee I don't think that personal hobbies and the people I hang out with would chance. I do believe that the idea of society standards would change such as being looked at different, and being paid more.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

socialization based on gender

Brianne Wagner

Sociology 131

m/w 5:30

As I was growing up, much of my socialization was shaped by the gender roles that were unintentionally played out by my parents. Although I believe they did not realize they were following the typical ways of societies expectations, they did in fact shape both my brothers' and my socialization. As far back as I can remember, my father has been in the construction and contracting business while my mother has shuffled back and forth between being a stay at home mom or working jobs that involve cleaning houses or cooking for schools. Both my my parents fell into jobs that placed them under societies gender roles.

Having two older brothers and being the baby of the family, I believe gender roles played an important role in the way my family was socialized. Because my father worked the rough-neck life for so long, he imagined the same life for his two sons and for some reason imagined his daughter earning an education and moving on to some type of career. I believe this had a lot to do with the fact that I was the youngest as well as a female. Unfortunately, my father never expected too much from my brothers and although he did not want them in trouble, he only wished for them to work along side him, or on some other labor- type job of their own. Education and career paths were never expectations for my brothers as they were for me.

In addition to my fathers underlying gender bias, my grandfather also had gender roles laid out for me but his were not so underlying. Because my grandfather is very "old-school" and set in his ways, he believes women should stick to women things and let the men take care of the hard work. For example, when he would go hunting every dove season, he would always invite my brothers and even though I would beg to go, he would tell me that I should stay with my Nana and help her make dinner for that night. My grandpa would also criticize my dad for taking me fishing, or letting me skateboard or do any other activity that was meant for boys. It was these types of beliefs that might have lead me to the position I am in now.

Today, I am a senior in college and on my way to becoming an English teacher. Coincidence? Probably not so much. They way that my parents viewed the raising of their children as well as the outside influence from extended family most likely had much to do with the places that my brothers and I ended up in. While I spend my days working full time at a minimum wage job and reading my way through college, my brothers find work anywhere they can with a hammer on their hip and the sun on their shoulders just like my dad and grandfather.

If I had been born a boy just like Robert and Kenny, I am sure that I would be working right along side them with my father. My father would have had a completely different set of expectations for me and I might not like where I ended up.

In my interview asking this same question, the respondent discussed how her childhood socialization did not involve any gender specification. She was not expected to choose girl toys or act like a girl but she feels that if she had been a young boy wanting to act the same way and play with girl toys, there would have been more of a stigma against her. Her parents would not have cared but friends and outsiders would have assumed a young boy playing with girl toys would turn out gay. She did not begin experiencing negative comments and attitudes until she was in high school because of her tom-boy characteristics. If she were male, it probably would have happened a lot sooner and would have been a lot more aggressive. She felt grateful that she had no expectations as a child and that lead to her being able to brush off the bullying when she was older.

http://icati.catishack.com/uploads/BrianneWagner/BrianneWagner-13162474009-20140911-1410398837.634.mp3

Nesenia Gonzalez

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Today in class for our interview my interviewee was asked to tell me how her life would be if she was the opposite sex. She said that she would be able to not she does her emotions as much as she does right know that she is a girl. At parties she would not be called slut or be judged for being art the party.

For me my life would be different because i would not have my mom asking me to have kids and get married. I would not get judged for dating people. I would be like my little brother because he acts like me and looks like me.

Weekly participation from Renee Martin SOC 131

The question posed to my interviewee was, "How would your life be different if you were born a different sex?"

She told me that among many things her career choice would be different if she were born male. She said she felt that as a man she would feel pressure to provide for a family and have a stable profitable job. She also said she felt that if she were born male the major she has chosen would be more profitable as a male rather than a female. Right now her major is music, she felt that a music career for a male is easier to come by than it is for females. She explained that she felt a man's voice commands more attention and it is easier to form an all male band and become quite popular whereas an all female band is much more difficult to maintain and gain fans. She went on to also say that her family structure would be different because she has two older sisters with whom she is very close with. She felt that as a male she would feel more distance from them because of the divide of sexes.

As far as myself, I believe my entire upbringing would be different if I were born male. I was the last child born; my father had always stressed to me that he was holding out for a daughter and was happy that I was a daughter. So if I were born male I assume I would have more younger siblings until he and my mom eventually had a daughter. My two older brothers were expected to get jobs and save up to buy their own cars whereas my dad bought me my car. I hadn't worked for it at all, I believe that would be completely different if I were born male. I'm sure I would have had to buy my own car like my brothers.

I tried to attach my mp3 file link for my interview audio but for some reason it wont work. I will come in during office hours to fix this problem for future assignments.

Sociology 131 Extra Credit

Sociological Imagination

Stephanie Grieb

In society today, many women have taken some of the roles that men have been taking back then. Therefore, many would say that men and women are seen as equals, but there are many generalizations about the two genders that some people have either forgotten or ignored. In class on Wednesday, we were asked to interview a classmate and ask them how it would be different if they were born as the other sex. When I was asked, I said that my interests might be a little different. For example, I used to dance, but maybe if I were male I might want to do football or wrestling since I could have more strength, but that's only an assumption; obviously I could still dance if I were male. My personality would be different; I might be more aggressive rather than soft and quiet and the way I dress would obviously be different. However, I liked the way my classmate that I interviewed responded. The interviewee said that if they were born of the opposite gender, they would have the same personality as they have now because they wouldn't know about their original gender. The interviewee also said that because she grew up in a household with all men, the people she associates wouldn't change much. Also she said that since her interests are mainly drawing and writing, they wont change either. The interviewee stated that being born a different gender, wouldn't change that much about her and I thought she made an excellent point because not all men are more loud and independent than some women may be, so you can't just assume that you will automatically become more independent only because you're male. From this, the answer to this question probably depends on how a person perceives themselves and how they see society's perception of the gender roles.

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Extra credit

Karanvir Gill

The socialization that I have had in my life has pretty much been dominated by masculine and feminine thoughts/behaviors. From day one, my parents described how I am supposed to live, think, and speak based on my male gender. I was supposed to be strong, being able to lift heavy objects that just got heavier as I grew older. I don't mind being strong at all, it is amazing, but it would have been nice to have a choice in the matter. Since I was a child, I was supposed to be independent and experienced. My parents would always remind me to ask help only when needed, and to try and learn things by actually doing it. Again, I do not mind these teachings that are ingrained in me, as today I am confident in new experiences and challenges while others are not. These are a couple of masculine traits that shaped my socialization. All the feminine traits, however, were shunned from my development process. I was taught to not be soft, weak, emotional, passive and many other "traits" that are exclusively feminine. Even though I was advised from parents to avoid these traits, it turns out that I actually am somewhat passive, and a bit emotional. And my socialization is influenced by having these traits by how people treat me. Luckily, I have been treated mostly good throughout my life, but I believe that is because I am not overly emotional or passive, and still have many masculine traits. If I was born the opposite sex, I am pretty sure I would be the complete opposite of who I am now because I would have been taught to be feminine instead of masculine. There would be constant lectures from parents to be a "good" female in society. But even without influence from parents, I probably would not want most masculine traits anyways. I don't think I would want to be the girl that is stronger than all the other girls and some boys. I believe that I would succumb to be how society would want me to be. The influence from society is just too strong.

http://icati.catishack.com/uploads/Karanvir/Karanvir-18184366582-20140911-1410398785.626.mp3

What I heard my interviewee is that he is influenced from the male side of the family, and lives by what is expected from them. He told me that the male side of this family does a lot of male stereotype things such as watching sports and being strong. After I asked the respondent how life would be for him if he was a female, he told me he would probably be like his grandma and mom, the female influences in his life. They are organized, settled and live with "pace", and my interviewee said he would probably be the same because it is what's expected from a female.

Friday, September 12, 2014

Kimberly Simonds

If I was to be asked "What behavior and thoughts would be different if you were born of the opposite sex? I was born a female. If I were a male, I know life would have been extremely different. For instance, as a young boy, I would have been able to "rough house" play, and to be loud and noisy. When I was growing up, I was expected to be passive, quiet and play with dolls. My teenage years would be different as well if I was a male. I feel that I would have a lenient curfew with my parents. It would also be more accepted if I was rebellious. I would, without a doubt, have less physical and emotional changes going through puberty. Growing up as a female in my teenage years, my parents would seldom let me go out on a date; I was asked the "101 questions." Where are you going? Who are you going with? What are you going to do? When are you coming home? etc...(The list goes on and on) I grew up with two brothers; they were never asked these questions. If I ever got in the slightest trouble, I got the riot act, grounded for weeks and the feeling of disappointment toward my parents. Puberty is a whole new ball game in itself. If I was a male, my voice would change, as a female, it was my job to be presentable, for example, do my hair, make-up, shave various parts of the body, (arms and legs) and we can't forget the menstrual cycle. So, in all aspects, this is actually when I would love being a male. As an adult, being a male has its advantages and disadvantages. If I was a male, the advantages would include, not giving birth, raising the children and the housework. The disadvantage would be the pressure of maintaining a steady income for my family. I would always have to protect the family emotionally, physically and monetary. As a female, we are naturally nurturing. For me, raising my children and cleaning the house was the better end of the stick, than that of my husband. The advantages are after work, being a male, I would be able to relax the rest of the day, have a meal cooked for me, my clothes cleaned and my castle (home) clean and organized.

My Interview

My interviewee was a female; no names are mentioned to protect her identity. The question at hand for this interview is, "Do you think your life would be different if you were born a male?" My interviewee answered yes, that her life would be different as a male. She claims that she would not endure female health issue or pains (Cists on ovaries) that a male does not have that problem. The interviewee also claimed that her parents wanted a boy, when she was born. Furthermore, the interviewee claims that if she was a male, her parents would have been less strict on the nightly curfew rules. I proceeded to ask her. "How does that make you feel?" Her response... ANGRY". In the regards of younger siblings, she has a sister, if she were a male, there would have been less responsibility to help her mother tend and care for her sister, if she was a male. I asked the interviewee, "Do you think your friendships would be different?" she claims it would be different, in a negative sense, she claims that male friendships tend to drift apart through the years. The interviewee was then asked a question in relating to the work place. "If she was male, would it influence her choice of job she is seeking now?" The respondent claims "no" Her future job is in the Criminology field, she claims that the female gender is highly sought out for in this field.

http://icati.catishack.com/uploads/KimSimonds/KimSimonds-14152302983-20140911-1410398498.604.mp3

Note: This interview would not be valid to use in my study. I did not get consent from the interviewee.

Extra Credit

Interview summary:

When I asked the person I was interview what would be different if he was of the opposite sex the first thing he said that he would have less freedom because he was from a Mexican background. While growing up he saw his sisters having to deal with this. He told me that when his sisters where coming to Fresno State they had to live with their uncle, while he was able to get an apartment with his friends. He also said that they had to go back home every weekend and that he had the choice of going back to home on weekends if he wanted. The interviewee also said that as a female he would have more responsibilities. While growing up his sisters would have to do things around the house, that also include taking care of him. Another thing he told me was that he didn't think his social network would be any different from the one he already has. He stated that even if he were to be a girl he'd prefer to be friends with guys rather than with girls. Lastly he said that he doesn't think his personality would be any different if he were a girl.

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1) What masculine and feminine thoughts/behaviors shaped your socialization?  

2) What behavior and thoughts would be different if you were born of the opposite sex?

1) I believe that the thoughts/behaviors that shaped my socialization the most would have to be that females are dependent and fragile. The reason why these two has had a greater affect on me is because coming from a Mexican background I'm not given as much freedom as my brothers. I'm dependent on my parents a lot more than my brothers are, but I'm not sure if this is because I'm a female or because I'm going to college full time, it could be a little of both.

2) If I were of the opposite sex I would be able to enjoy a lot more freedom than I do now. I think I would also be a lot more confident in myself. The reason I think this is because as a girl I always have the "this isn't lady like" thought in the back of my head. I feel like if I were a male I wouldn't have to worry about what people said when I did something that wasn't appropriate for a female to do. I also wouldn't have to worry about having to prove myself to other guys when I'm playing online. Usually when I play online guys see me as an easy target since I'm a girl, so I have to prove to them that I can play the game as well as them. My social network wouldn't change or at least I don't think so. The reason I think this is because I already have more guy friends than girl friends. If I were a guy I would probably have the same amount of girl friends that I do now. Since I'm sort of a "tomboy" I think my personality would be the same. I just think I'll be a lot more confidant in the things that I do.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Extra credit participation

Cynthia Quintanilla

Even in America, people are brainwashed into particular gender roles. Well, I'm Mexican to boot. This means I grew up with very strict gender ideas. These ideas include the typical: woman as caregiver, woman as virgin until marriage, woman as fragile, man as breadwinner, man as a permissible philanderer, and man as strong as bull. To add insult to injury, my limitations went further than if I'd have American parents. The sexism was widespread and these roles were - and still are- ingrained into my culture, including the women whom seem to believe it should be that way. As an elementary school kid, I played pogs and marbles with my cousins after school at my grandmother's house. Out would come my uncle and take my pogs and marbles because "those aren't for girls." His ridicule was constant and it extended to my male cousins if I ever beat them at any game. "Danny got beat by a girl! You should be embarrassed," he'd say. Of course, this was early in my childhood. Unfortunately, I grew up with an inconvenient thing called a vagina and the taunts grew into insults and degradation. My very traditional dad is accustomed to being waited on hand and foot, so on one Saturday morning in my early teens, after having teamed up with my mom to power clean the house, my dad calls me outside. There I see him drinking with his friends while bowls that once held shrimp cocktail are strewn about. "Clean this up," he told me. Before even thinking, I made a face that expressed how I didn't want more work. I got in a few words of my complaint-to-be before he cut me off. "Be quiet and do it! You are here to serve me." With that, I grabbed the dishes and angrily went inside. That was it. Over the years I had never been allowed to go hunting with my dad, go over to friends' houses, play with "boy" things, or help my dad build things in the backyard. My younger brother, however, received all these privileges. Over the years, I was cruelly reprimanded for not considering it a pleasure to clean the house and play servant. My dad would come home from work, plop on the recliner, and ask me to bring him a drink and take off his shoes. If it wasn't me then it was my mom. Normally, making him comfortable wouldn't be a big deal, except that my mom also worked the same 12-hour job. She came home cooking and tying up loose ends around the house. This I saw day in and day out. I hated not being valued. Anything I did well, it was devalued because it was women's work. Soon after, I became a guy.

My sophomore year of high school I changed my name to Rodney-after my favorite skater at the time- changed my dress style to be more noticeably male (loose jeans, baggy shirts, backward caps). I even changed my facial expressions. I made sure to smile less, stand taller, and I avoided colors associated with women. I would recommend action movies to my dad and I'd sit with him while he watched hoping for some bonding time, hoping he would like me. I don't know why I wanted approval from someone who I didn't like. My stint as a male didn't stick for too long, I eventually got tired of not smiling and went back to doing my own thing, which I never considered to be very feminine in the first place. What initially began as imitation to gain respect turned into resentment and I began to loathe men. What a child! After much learning and self-exploration I wrote an essay titled "Equal, Not the Same" and thus I put a foot into the door of feminism. If I had been born a male, I'd probably dress in the way socially acceptable for men, but less snazzy and lazier. That's the type of woman I am now. I cannot for the life of me find the will to go through an hour of beautification. I feel very neutral, but I'm sure that is far from true. Everything about me has been carefully constructed by society. I wear tighter jeans because it's acceptable for women and good luck trying to find any other kind in a women's department store, but they're bellbottoms because I stopped paying attention to fashion in the 8th grade. I have long hair compared to men because women have long hair. I knew women out there were treated as I was but I never heard any of them complain. I figured they were happy to fit the feminine mold; they were good at it. Regardless of our current gender situations, I'm happy to be female. It took me a while to realize it. I am able to visible feelings without being jeered. I can cry if I want to. I don't understand why the women are ridiculed for being sensitive or having feelings. I consider those things to be superpowers. I feel I can live more fully and explosively if I feel deeply. I'm not naive to believe men don't have feelings. Of course they do. Unfortunately, they keep those "women germs" deeply hidden else they be called a sissy, a pussy, a vag, a little bitch, a girl, a fag. You know, all things synonymous with women. Because being a woman somehow has become the ultimate insult.